As I was praying and reflecting on the readings for today, I couldn’t help but notice how many times I’ve failed to forgive those around me when I have felt hurt or misunderstood. I think one of the hardest things for me that God constantly calls me to do is to forgive, and yet of all the virtues, this is the hardest for me. Today, as I read the readings and the Gospel, God reminds me that He is bigger than all of these issues, worries, and anxious thoughts that I face. He reminds me that He is willing to receive me with his hands wide open. These past two years, I’ve come across many difficult circumstances in my personal life that have been quite life-changing, and they seem to have hindered the relationship I have with God, but somehow, I’ve managed to stay close to Him. I always ponder why it is that I am still here constantly rebuilding my relationship with God, and I genuinely feel that faith saves me every time. The other day at work, I was speaking with a coworker about God, and he mentioned something that really spoke to me. He was explaining to me that he’s questioned what the easiest way to understand God’s love is. He said something along the lines of, “God’s love is what fills all the gaps.” He elaborated by giving a couple of examples: when you lack support from your family, you find that in God’s love; when you don’t have a father figure, that’s God’s love; when you’re poor, you look towards God’s love; when you’re mentally drained, that’s God’s love. God has endlessly filled so many gaps in my life, even those that I felt were impossible to fill or that I didn’t think needed to be filled. In today’s Gospel, Peter asks Jesus how many times we must forgive someone if they’ve sinned against us. Jesus replies, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times. That is why the Kingdom of heaven may be likened to a king who decided to settle accounts with his servants.” He later says, “So will my Heavenly Father do to you, unless each of you forgives your brother from your heart.” Although I feel a fearful reverence towards God, there is also an unexplainable admiration that I feel. God’s unconditional love will never amount to anything that I can offer, but it reiterates to me how beautiful God’s heart is. I think that every time I forgive someone, I get to know God’s heart deeper and deeper, and once again, He never fails to fill yet another gap in my heart and in my life. Therefore, Lord Heavenly Father, let us dare to be drawn deeper into your heart through the acts of forgiveness and reconciliation, especially in those areas where we lack the most. Amen.
— Anonymous